During the initial weeks after retirement there was a flurry of activity on my end. I thought I’d have all this free time, and I needed a way to maximize it all. I set up an independent mail server for my project needs (i.e. the plethora of mailing lists I would undoubtedly be able to keep up with). I read Getting Things Done. I read the follow-up to Getting Things Done. I set up an incredibly intricate system to keep track of projects, TODO lists, etc. Ahem, Org Mode. And of course, as in all things emacs, I read copious amounts of documentation so I could write an enormous amount of lisp code to tweak every conceivable feature to save me 5 minutes every 2 weeks.  Ah…free time, how I missed you!

I tried approaching retirement the same way I did work. I kept a list of current and future projects, made endless task lists, and prioritized them. Then I realized, that there’s not much time leftover once you get kids ready in the morning, walk them to school at a glacial pace (“look papa, a stick”), and cook. Before you know it, it’s time to pick the munchkins up from school, and keep them entertained, or at least under control until supper time. OK, let’s be realistic, make sure Mai doesn’t kill Lola accidentally.

I think I was a bit too optimistic when I thought quitting work would provide me with endless free time. That may have been the case had I not had kids, but that, my friend, is not my reality. I am now understanding why in an days of yore, stay at home moms weren’t discovering penicillin in their free time. There’s a good reason Marie Curie had a nanny!

My mom did manage to finish nursing school while being a mom and keeping a job. She is a super woman! Me, on the other hand, I’m not even trying to be the sidekick to a mediocre superhero. If I don’t have to change peed on sheets on any given day, I consider it a resounding success.

I’m trying to keep expectations down. If within the next year, I keep my kids from drowning from neglect in the bathtub, and as a stretch goal, get a European driver’s license, I’ll consider it a year well spent.

I’m a bit disillusioned with the whole FIRE movement. I’ve slowly come to realize that all these early retirees I idolized had one thing in common: they weren’t taking care of two toddlers! So yeah, let’s pare down expectations.